How to massage the prostate. Simple techniques to get you started.

Prostate massage isn’t as difficult as you might think. Let’s dispel some myths and give you the straight facts to make your experience even better.

Some males can achieve orgasm through prostate stimulation alone.  This is quite extraordinary, even though it isn’t common knowledge.  What guy wouldn’t want to heighten their sexual experience?  Perhaps anal stimulation is out of the realm of possibility for some men.  That is understandable, but one shouldn’t knock it until they try it!

A prostate massage can be performed on one’s self, or with a willing partner.  Men can stimulate their prostate glad (also called the male g spot) during masturbation, with penetrative anal devices.  Even a proper amount of pressure on the perineum in the area of the prostate can heighten the sexual response.  In other words, whether going solo or with a partner, those orgasms can be amplified significantly!


Here’s what we are covering in this post:

  • Internal prostate massage
  • External prostate massage
  • Prostate orgasm
  • Precautions


Internal prostate massage

How to massage the prostate yourself

All you need is a free hand or a prostate massager.  Here we go:

  1. Make sure your bowel is empty, or at least use the restroom before you start.  This can prevent messy mishaps.
  2. Get into a relaxed state of mind.  Listen to some music. Mediate.  Whatever it takes to calm down.  This makes the whole process easier.  Don’t rush.
  3. Apply a generous amount of anal lubrication (preferably water based) in and around the rectum.  This is a very important step, which will prevent pain or discomfort.  See our guide to buying an anal lubricant.
  4. Get into a comfortable position.  The easiest way to reach the prostate is while squatting or bending over.  The gland will be pressed against the rectal wall in these positions, making it easier to reach.
  5. Insert a finger or your favorite prostate massager.  It may be easier to use a massager, as this increases mobility and provides some leverage.  Go slow.  Work your way in gently.  Your sphincter muscles will relax soon.  You may experience a feeling of “fullness”.  This is perfectly normal.
  6. When you reach the prostate, do not poke or prod it.  The prostate feels a bit more firm than the surrounding area.  You will know when you hit the spot.
  7. When you are ready, use gentle circular or side to side motions when performing the massage.  This prevents injury to the gland and to the surrounding rectal tissue.
  8. Keep going with a pressure and pace that feels right.  If you experience any pain or discomfort, STOP!  If it feels good, keep going!
prostate location

How to do it with a partner

The basics are still the same as the solo method, shown above.  You may find that prostate stimulation with a partner is much more pleasing.  A gentle partner will be able to hit all the right spots much easier than you.  They can get into the rectum at the perfect angle, so all you have to think about are those mind blowing orgasms.

Remember that communication is KEY.  Your partner must be able to listen and follow your directions on what feels good and what doesn’t.  The two of you should determine a “safe word”  or a special signal to stop beforehand.  This safe word can be used when things aren’t feeling right, or if you want things to stop.  FULL STOP.  Any pain or serious discomfort means that you are potentially damaging your goods down there.  We don’t want that now, do we?




External prostate massage

Here’s the other, less intrusive way to enjoy this erotic pleasure!

Essentially, it is massaging the prostate without inserting fingers or other devices into the rectum.  With this technique, the perineum is the most important area of focus.  Women and men have a perineum, but since we are talking prostate stimulation, we are focusing on the male.

The perineum is the area of skin between the base of the scrotum and the anus.  It is easy to identify as there is a “ridge” of skin that is easily felt with one’s fingers.  This is the area to focus on.  The prostate gland is located just above it.

External massage has positives and negatives when compared to internal massage.


    • It’s less messy.  Oils and lubes are not required.
    • No messy fecal matter to deal with
    • For guys uncomfortable with anal penetration, this is a viable alternative


    • It’s not as intense as direct, anal stimulation.  There’s more distance between the outside and the prostate, so it’s more difficult to apply the proper amount of pressure.
    • After experiencing stimulation via penetration, the external technique may not be worth the effort

 How to do it

Use your fingers – Use three fingers: index, middle and ring.  You can do this with or without lube or oil.  I recommend using an organic oil, such as sesame, coconut or grape seed oil.  These lubricate very well and prevent any irritation from friction.  

Place the fingers, held closely together, on the perineum.  Using firm but gentle pressure, feel around until you find the right spot.  I find it is best to do this in “sets.”  Similar to a set that a weightlifter would do.  One set could be massaging the area slowly but firmly 5 times in a clockwise motion.  The do a counterclockwise set.  Repeat this as many times, with as many repetitions as you see fit.  Do what feels right.  If you feel discomfort, stop, and try again later.

As an added bonus, you can squeeze the buttocks while doing the massage.  This will help to strengthen the pelvic muscles and can add a bit of extra “oomph” to your session.

Pro tip:  squeezing the buttocks and strengthening the pelvic muscles can also help with a man’s sexual performance.  Exercising these muscles can help to delay ejaculation during intercourse.  This can significantly prolong and enhance a man’s sexual prowess.  Strong pelvic muscles allow a man to have control over when he climaxes, thus enhancing his sexual prowess.

For maximum benefit, take it one step further

When approaching orgasm via masturbation or intercourse, apply this same technique.  Your partner can even do the massage for you, if you choose.  When reaching climax, massage your perineum with a firm but gentle circular motion.  It’s best to start doing this about 30 seconds before you cum.  Continue until ejaculation.

This technique will add a significant boost to your orgasm and can literally leave you feeling drained, but extremely satisfied.  The climax will be more intense, and will have a longer duration.  Again, apply only as much pressure as is necessary.  Too much and it could leave your crotch feeling sore.


Prostate Orgasm

Prostate orgasm is achieved by stimulating or massaging the male prostate gland, to the point of orgasm.  Generally, a finger or prostate stimulator is used.  Many men are able to experience multiple orgasms with this method.  Normally, having multiples is difficult because of the refractory period after intercourse.  A guy usually needs to rest for a bit after the act, and their erection often goes away as well.

Prostate massage and orgasm make these common problems go away.  Men can experience the same pleasure as women by having multiple and continuous orgasms.  Sound like fun to you?  Oh yeahhhhh…

Ahhh…youth.  Like Energizer Bunnies

Younger guys can usually keep going and going and going, even after ejaculation.  In my younger days I could definitely keep going, even immediately after ejaculation.  As I grow older, into my fourth decade, I have found that erections aren’t as easy to maintain after a traditional orgasm . I’m sure that many of you older guys will agree with me on this.  It sucks getting older.  But like a fine wine, we get better with age!  At least that’s what my girlfriend tells me.  Hopefully she is telling me the truth!

This is different from traditional orgasms where the man is stimulated through masturbation, sexual intercourse, fellatio, etc.  With prostate orgasm, a man can reach orgasm MULTIPLE times.  Like women who are able to have extended or back to back orgasms, we can do the same thing.  Prostate orgasm is generally MUCH more intense and sexually fulfilling.  At least for me.  And I know a lot of other gentlemen would agree with me on this.

The Fear Factor

Far too many men neglect their prostate.  Fear and/or lack of knowledge hold men back from exploring this virtual fantasy land that sits so close to their prized possession, their penis.  We are all VERY familiar with our junk, right?  We touch it every day when we use the bathroom, so we consider it a vital part of our bodies.  Losing it would be worse than losing an arm or a leg…seriously!

For others, anal play is considered to be taboo.  This is utter nonsense.  Social mores should not deter a man from enjoying his own body.  His body is his temple and he can do whatever the heck he wants to do with it.

Now, go forth and enjoy your new erotic knowledge!  Share it with your girlfriend, boyfriend, lover or friend with benefits.  Tell your guy pals about it.  Chances are they either don’t know about it or are scared to discuss it.  Rubbish, I say.  They don’t know what they’re missing!




With massive pleasure comes the downside; one must take great care not to exert TOO much pressure on the area.  If doing this with a partner, it is critical that the “giver” pays close attention to the “receiver”.  The giver needs to look for any signs of pain or discomfort on the partner.  Some partners agree on a “stop word” that is communicated beforehand.  This is an effective method to make sure things don’t get out of hand, or someone gets hurt.  Remember, communication is KEY.

Sometimes it is necessary to use a smaller instrument or a finger to “work up” to the massager tool.  This helps to minimize discomfort that some might experience.  The larger tool can then be used after the sphincter muscles have had time to relax.

Massagers can be used with or without condoms.  If using without a condom, it is very important to clean and sanitize it thoroughly for obvious reasons.  Never use on another partner unless it is absolutely clean.

Lastly, it is very important to use plenty of anal lubrication!.  Without lubrication improper use of the massager can damage the rectal lining.  This can cause a host of other problems.  No need to go into all those details, as long as we always take the proper precautions, RIGHT?!

Remember, if there is pain or discomfort, just STOP!  Otherwise this can be one of the most pleasurable experiences a man can have!


 More information

You might be interested in the “Tao of Sex.”  Some really good info on prostate massage and ejaculation.  Make sure to read about the pressure point called the Jen-Mo.  Click here to read more.

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